3 Weeks!!!!!!!!!!!

I know it has been a long time since I have updated and I apologize. The past few weeks, life has been busy. The enthusiasm and motivation I felt in the past few months began to dwindle and instead of continuing to update and let you know where I am, I just neglected doing this.

3 weeks from tomorrow I will be running 26.2 miles! I am nervous and my thoughts have been all over the place.

I have never participated in an individual focused sport. Meaning I have always been a part of a team. When I was younger, I never understood running because there was no ball or goal. Just finish or if you are real good, beat every one else. But that has never been the case for me. Even though I am on Team in Training, I will be running this race as Katie Chance, 25 yr old female from Philadelphia. Today I realized that running is competing with yourself. My whole life I have always run because I was told to. If I walked at practice a whistle blew and a coach told me to pick it up and jog. Walking was not an option. I haven't been to a team run in a few weeks and when I have been running the long runs, I have been taking more walk breaks. I'm even hesitant to write this next sentence. Going back to the team runs scares me now because I know I will be slower than I was a month ago. I know that I will finish this marathon and that is the goal, but I am already getting worried that I will walk most of it. Finishing a marathon is finishing a marathon no matter which way you look at it, but my mind is telling me I HAVE TO RUN..It's like the whistle is being blown in my mind. The past few runs I have been waiting for them to be over and not able to enjoy the run. But when I did my 20 miles on Sunday last week and I was walking, I enjoyed every step.

Am I saying I am going to give up on running and walk from here on out? No. But I am saying that I noticed I enjoyed the miles I walked significantly more than the miles I jogged. I know my mind is all over the place and I have 3 weeks until I need to really worry, but this is where I'm at. I talked to a friend the other day about the guilt I felt because of my lack of motivation and she put it back into perspective. She told me to focus and remember the real reason I am doing this. TO think about the people that I am raising money for. She said that I have been doing selfless things and in another month I will have plenty of time to spend on myself. She was absolutely right. Essentially it would be selfish for me to get in my own way of what I Have been training for the past 5 months. Am I nervous? Absolutely. But knowing that I have the support of so many people really does help me realize that I can...no I will do this. I have to take my training one run at a time, even one step at a time for the next 21 days...





Fundraising

I am still a little less than $400 short!! If you have been thinking about donating but have not been able to yet, please do it soon. Monday they will be billing my credit card. I will still have time to make the money back but it will be out of my pocket, come Monday. Thank you to everyone who has donated and those who continue to support me everyday :)